This week, like most, still managed to find time for reading articles, seeing posts, and blossoming new thoughts. In the transgender community, there has been two recent completions of suicide, and two folks I knew previously in life, that came out. Reminds me of when someone dies, another person is born.
There are transgender people everywhere. Sadly, a few of the articles from this week have called transgender people "diseased", "evil", and "mentally ill". These labels are outrageously transphobic. There are innocent children revealing themselves as transgender nearly daily. Here are people, some of them are our leaders, demonizing and pathologizing the experience and identities of transgender folks. They have been throwing insults, attempting to further marginalize our community. While scrolling through social media in the last several days, there's been countless statuses relating to transphobia, abuse, and cruelty from cisgender peers. We all revolve around the sun together, and maybe someday we can live in harmony with one another. It's incredibly heartbreaking to see my trans siblings suffering at the hands of cisgender folks. In fact the two folks I've known since before they came out, their immediate families aren't being supportive. One is an adult, that is married and has been given an ugly choice. Being stay the same, living a lie, to continue their marriage, or divorce to transition. They aren't the only one going through this. As many of you know, I help to run two online support groups for transgender people. I've seen this ultimatum numerous times expressed in posts in these groups, and others I'm a member of. The second is an adolescent person. When reading through Facebook, I noticed their gender and name change, but shortly after saw their mother referring to them with conflicting pronouns. I politely asked about the pronoun and name difference. To which the reply was more misgendering and the child pitching in a comment referring to their certainty of their chosen pronouns. Situations like these obviously need attention brought to the problematic behaviors by the cisgender people involved. To behave in these manners is acts of violence toward your transgender partner, child, family member, or friend. Let me say this, the ONLY known treatment for gender identity disorder (being transgender), is allowing the trans person the validity of their pronouns, chosen name, and identified gender. With that being said, not everyone wants to change their name, pronouns or appearance, but still identify as transgender, and that's completely valid as well. Something Kat says a lot, and I believe is relevant here and would like to share with newly coming out, or questioning individuals: " No one knows you like you know yourself", and it's absurd to believe anyone can tell you who you are better than you can. You are the best expert on who you are, and how you identify. Don't ever let anyone tell you who you ought to be, just be your authentic self! I hope maybe someday we can erase the lines of division. I hope maybe someday our world will be filled with the authentic versions of each individual, instead of replicated carbon copies of standard "man/woman". I hope maybe someday intersectional equality will be a truth, a given, and an inalienable right
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Authors:James and Katherine are a transgender couple raising two kids. They were southerners when coming to understand themselves as trans. Ultimately it lead to a nearly three year road trip to find home. Now they are re-housed and still focused on outreach in the transgender community! Archives
October 2020
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